I first heard about Vampire Academy on tumblr when the movie trailer was released. In case there are any doubts about exactly why I was instantly and irrevocably sold on it, here is that trailer:
High school vampire story by the director of Mean Girls, featuring a BUNCH of more than mildly (if potentially only platonically) in love ladies, and a TEACHER/STUDENT ROMANCE? FRIENDS, I AM SO HERE FOR THIS. I wanted to at least read the first book before seeing the film and then the film either got a v limited UK release or went straight to dvd BUT I own BOTH the first book AND the movie now so LET'S GET CRACKING.
Chapter 1
In which we meet our super not bro heroines and they immediately run into trouble.
"I felt her fear before I heard her screams."... WHAT AN AUSPICIOUS BEGINNING.
We meet our heroines while one of them is having a nightmare that will no doubt become Significant later. They are Rose and Lissa, who apparently sleep in the same room. I started shipping them on the first page and haven't looked back. GOOD TIMES WITH THE SOULBONDED LADIES. (... spoiler?)
ANYWAY Lissa is having a nightmare about "fire and blood, the smell of smoke, the twisted metal of a car" so she is obviously fine and has no trauma in her past at all. Rose wakes up from her own dream because she suddenly starts dreaming Lissa's dream which also seems fine and not at all like they might be soulbonded in a narratively crucial and/or making out way. Rose wakes Lissa up and they snuggle for a while (AN IMPORTANT DETAIL I RECORD FOR US ALL) before Rose realizes it's been days since Lissa fed and straight up offers her own neck. This was the point in the trailer, when I knew nothing about the series at all, that sold me HARD, because I am a shallow, shallow person. Shut up. WE MOVE ON.
 |
| ..... we move on after this picture from the trailer of TWO BRO LADIES BEING BROS <.< |
... I'm on page 2. THIS IS GOING WELL SO FAR.
So Lissa drinks from Rose and Rose is into it -
Her fangs bit into me, hard, and I cried out at the brief flare of pain. Then it faded, replaced by a wonderful, golden joy that spread through my body. It was better than any of the times I'd been drunk or high. Better than sex - or so I imagined, since I'd never done it. It was a blanket of pure, refined pleasure, wrapping me up and promising everything would be right in the world. On and on it went. The chemicals in her saliva triggered an endorphin rush, and I lost track of the world, lost track of who I was.- like, super into it. Afterwards, Rose is all weak and floppy and post-coital (<.<) so Lissa goes to get her something to eat. (Being the person left in bed after sex while the other person brings food is one of the GREATEST THINGS so, like, a+ work on that relationship, Rose.) While Lissa is gone, Rose notices their housemate's cat is acting weird(er than normal), which is a problem. It's a problem because cats don't have a problem with Moroi but they DO have a problem with dhampirs, which makes total sense because - wait, what?
~~*~~BOOK-SPECIFIC VOCAB LESSON~~*~~
Rose is a dhampir and Lissa is a Moroi. Dhampirs protect Moroi. Both are a type of vampire? THIS IS ALL THE INFORMATION I HAVE AT THIS POINT IN THE BOOK. #informative
~~*~~END OF VOCAB LESSON~~*~~
So when Rose looks out to see what is freaking out the cat, there is TOTALLY SOMEONE LOOKING UP AT THEIR WINDOW WHAT NO THANK YOU. UNDERSTANDABLY this freaks Rose RIGHT out, especially considering the cat is freaked out too and ordinarily he only gets like that around Rose because her dhampir-ness puts him on edge and nope NOPE there is a threat outside RUN ROSE RUN.
Rose, because she is not an idiot, throws on her jeans and - HANG ON. IMPORTANT DETAIL TO NOTE: all the above comforting/totally bro neck-biting was going on while Rose wasn't wearing jeans?? SURE. COOL. FINE. WHATEVER. I AM CHILL ABOUT THIS INFORMATION. As I was saying, Rose throws on her jeans and grabs both hers and Lissa's wallets and books it to find Lissa. Lissa immediately understands that something is hella up and so makes no complaint when Rose tells her to use compulsion on their clueless dude housemate to make him give them his car keys.
(I love Rose.)
Apparently, Moroi can use compulsion to make humans (or possibly just anyone?) do things for them. Dhampirs have "a high resistance" to it and are also taught that it's wrong. And yet here is Rose making it happen.
(I LOVE Rose.)
So Clueless Dude Housemate hands over his car keys and Lissa and Rose run for it even though Rose is still all wobbly post-blood drinking etc and Lissa has to keep stopping her from falling. Lissa is all BUT WHAT IF THEY CATCH US and Rose is like NOPE I HAVE THIS PLAN and does in fact have a very workable plan of getting them both to the train station to hop a train to L.A. Rose has clearly thought this through. It is now page 8 and I am SO PRO ROSE. So is Lissa, as Rose can now "feel [Lissa's] faith in [her]". Aw, little soulbonded vampire girfriends.
Turns out that Rose and Lissa have been best friends since kindergarten (vampire kindergarten?) when they were paired up for name-spelling and Rose says they both have horrifyingly complicated names. Lissa is Vasilisa Dragomir and Rose is Rosemarie Hathaway. I don't know about you, but one of those names seems a lot less complicated than the other to me but W/E W/E Rose is busy being awesome so we'll let her off. They apparently bonded when Rose "chucked [her] book at [their] teacher and called her a fascist bastard." THE ANGER IS STRONG IN THIS ONE *_* The book hit the teacher because Rose has always had super good aim. &ROSE;
Back in the present day, Lissa suddenly hears footsteps and so they start properly running for the car. Rose keeps up despite being wobbly still, and they're just about to reach their escape Volvo (somewhere Edward Cullen is like I TOLD YOU THEY WERE A SAFE VEHICLE!!!!!) when NOPE instead the guy that was hanging around under their window pops up. Even in this time of crisis, Rose makes a note that he is a hot piece of ass. This dude is about 6'7, mid-twenties, and wearing a brown duster (a coat, not the housework cloth, just to be clear). He has dark brown hair in a ponytail and dark brown eyes and Rose is all but filling out his Tindr profile right there on the street.
Ponytail has come with like ten other people, which is apparently a Big Deal because Rose is all WAIT THE QUEEN DOESN'T GET THIS MANY GUARDIANS. (Possibly I should have twigged the reveal we're about to get at this point but I DID NOT.)
Ponytail gets a little closer to Lissa than Rose would like - DUDE I WOULD NOT IF I WERE YOU - and even though she realizes he's just trying to talk to them, her instincts kick in and she launches herself at him. FOR FIGHTING. NOT FOR BANGING. JUST TO BE CLEAR. Ponytail is faster than Rose is and she's about to hit the ground but Ponytail catches her by the arm before she can hurt herself. He keeps staring at her though - GET SOME, ROSE - and she figures out it's because the bite on her neck is still bleeding.
GOD I LOVE VAMPIRE STORIES. Everything is one step away from sex at all times!
Ponytail lets Rose go and she's about to attack him again but Lissa is like ROSE MAYBE NOT MAYBE WE LISTEN TO THE STRONG PEOPLE OUTNUMBERING US FOR A BRIEF MOMENT and Rose backs down.
Which is a solid plan because, you know, they are outnumbered and why start fighting before you know what you're up against and you might as well know what your enemy wants, and so they are ready to listen when Ponytail steps up and bows to Lissa.
He bows to Lissa??
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